We told you to never ever date a runner… you did anyway. Now these 12 things are your reality:

We gave you a list of reasons to never ever date a runner. You went right ahead and did it anyway. Now look what you've done.

Sinead Mulhern March 30, 2017

Dear readers, a while ago now, we brought you a list of reasons why dating a runner is a 100 per cent terrible idea. Fun fact: you loved it (thanks!). Even though we– the experts of running– warned you about the nasty things that would happen in your life if you get romantically involved with a runner, some of you went right ahead and did it anyway.

Fools.

If you read our wisdom and chose to ignore it, congratulations on your garbage life. Hate* to say we told you so…

* By hate, we mean love.

For those of you who ended up getting together with a runner, these points below are likely your reality. Just don’t marry this person or you will truly become a sad sack.

1. You regularly listen to the details of your boyfriend’s nip situation.

Like seriously, none of your friends’ boyfriends do this. There’s so much going on with his nipples, they could each have their own Twitter feed.

2. You have discovered socks everywhere.

It’s like you have a puppy rummaging through the laundry basket and then hiding them…

3. Your bf/gf says they have “a few items” for the laundry when really there’s enough clothes to stock a small boutique.

Relationship ultimatum: You do the laundry and we’re all good.

4. The only bars/ restaurants he/she knows are the ones on his running route.

But, you’ve found a few great city gems because of it.

5. This person has taken to timing activities that should not be timed.

You get the his fascination with timing laps on the track. Now he has taken that into the kitchen though and sets a timer for doing the dishes. Weird…

6. If you took a shot for every time they said “Strava” you’d be drunk consistently before 9:30 a.m.

Sometimes 7:00 a.m.

7. What’s with all the shoes?

The shoes pretty much need their own bedroom at this point. And you dreamed of a guest room or office space. Good luck with that.

8. She casually mentioned her poop to your friends like it was no big deal.

Mildly embarrassing.

9. You don’t know why you’ve tried so many sports gels but you have.

Your last boyfriend had the signature spaghetti sauce he’d ask you to sample all the time. This is like that only the sauce is actually the latest sports gel… and he tends to eat all of your spaghetti once he’s done running.

10. You know his sweat smell just as well as you know his signature cologne.

*Sniff, sniff* Yup, he’s home. *Hides snack you were just about to eat.*

11. You’re aware it’s love because you’ve gotten past his/her hideous feet.

The toenails, the blood, the blisters, the sweat… If you love this person despite all of this, congrats, you’ve found true love. This is what that looks like.

12. New activity that this person has brought to your life: driving country roads on Sunday keeping eyes peeled for them as they need a ride home.

Meanwhile other people are at Sunday brunch. Not that you’re complaining or anything.

Congratulations.