I’m facing my running fears

I’ve officially entered into my mid-year running hump. June is equivalent to the Wednesday of the year – the proverbial mid-week hump day. So it’s June, and that means I’m mid-way through my goal of running 12 races in 12 months.

I should have seen it coming. It would make sense that in June, I would be hitting a bit of a snag. Most people would expect it. But it did sneak up on me. After a great run in May at the Mother’s Day Chocolate Run in St. Catharines, I was excited and ready for the next chapter.

Then something happened. Since there was a full six weeks until my next race on June 25 at Rattlesnake Point in Milton, Ont., I figured I had lots of time to train. It’s amazing how fast time flies when you’re procrastinating.

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I got into a rut. I see this as an opportunity though, not an obstacle. I’m using this as a chance to reflect on how far I’ve come and my goals that lie ahead. I’ve looked long and hard at examining what I’m scared of when it comes to running. My goal is to obliterate them. There are enough obstacles in the way of my running (time demands, weather, etc). The last thing I need is a negative stream of thoughts swirling in my head.

In terms of fears, I have a few.

My list of fears:

Fear: My kids are running the 3K portion of the race this weekend. I’m worried they will get lost in the forest. Reality: Race organizers take great care in marking the race paths and often there are volunteers stationed along the way. They are usually there at a turning point or where the path isn’t as clear. My kids are 11 and 13 and they’re more capable, fierce and independent than I give them credit for. Another reality check: I could run with them but I fear that I’ll slow them down and they will be more worried about me than about themselves.

Fear: I will keel over during the race.
Reality: In the five races that I’ve participated in so far this year, this hasn’t happened to me yet. Nothing ventured, nothing gained.

Fear: I won’t be able to accomplish my running goals that I set for myself this year.
Reality: I’ve participated in every race that I said I would since the New Year’s Resolution run. Nothing has held me back, and I’ve been surrounded by the support of my loved ones and friends. Darn it all, I’m doing it.

I realize that I’m my own worst enemy and my fears are holding me back. So, tomorrow is the race. It’s my first race in the forest, with a combination of trails, single track, inclines, bridge crossing and maybe some cliff-dangling. Do I feel I’m ready? Not in the least. Will I do it? Absolutely. Will I have fun? You bet.